He couldn't ad-lib a fart after a baked-bean dinner.
- Johnny Carson (about Chevy Chase)
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He was as great as a man can be without morality.
- Alexis de Tocqueville
This entry was posted on Saturday, April 5th, 2008 at 1:06 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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The higher a monkey climbs, the more you see of its behind.
- Joseph Stilwell
This entry was posted on Friday, April 4th, 2008 at 11:21 pm and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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Why, this fellow don't know any more about politics than a pig knows about Sunday.
- Harry S Truman (about Dwight D. Eisenhower)
This entry was posted on Friday, April 4th, 2008 at 10:51 pm and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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… »
She got her good looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.
- Groucho Marx
This entry was posted on Tuesday, April 1st, 2008 at 7:15 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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Stay with me; I want to be alone.
- Joey Adams
This entry was posted on Tuesday, April 1st, 2008 at 5:21 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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Ordinarily he is insane. But he has lucid moments when he is only stupid.
- Heinrich Heine
This entry was posted on Monday, March 31st, 2008 at 3:57 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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There's nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won't cure.
- Jack E. Leonard
This entry was posted on Monday, March 31st, 2008 at 2:15 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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His golf bag does not contain a full set of irons.
- Robin Williams
This entry was posted on Monday, March 31st, 2008 at 12:33 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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He has every attribute of a dog except loyalty.
- Thomas P. Gore
This entry was posted on Sunday, March 30th, 2008 at 9:12 pm and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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A sophisticated rhetorician, inebriated with the exuberance of his own verbosity.
- Benjamin Disraeli
This entry was posted on Friday, March 28th, 2008 at 6:27 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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You're a good example of why some animals eat their young.
- Jim Samuels
This entry was posted on Friday, March 28th, 2008 at 4:44 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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In her single person she managed to produce the effect of a majority.
- Ellen Glascow
This entry was posted on Friday, March 28th, 2008 at 3:02 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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I could never learn to like her, except on a raft at sea with no other provisions in sight.
- Mark Twain
This entry was posted on Friday, March 28th, 2008 at 1:20 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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We'll get along fine as soon as you realize I'm God.
This entry was posted on Thursday, March 27th, 2008 at 8:12 pm and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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I always wanted to be a trouble-shooter but now I see you are not worth it!
This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 26th, 2008 at 5:43 pm and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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Nature not content with denying him the ability to think, has endowed him with the ability to write.
- A. E. Housman
This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 26th, 2008 at 4:51 pm and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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Failure has gone to his head.
- Wilson Mizner
This entry was posted on Monday, March 24th, 2008 at 2:46 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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So, a thought crossed your mind? Must have been a long and lonely journey.
This entry was posted on Sunday, March 23rd, 2008 at 9:57 pm and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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She is a peacock in everything but beauty.
- Oscar Wilde
This entry was posted on Sunday, March 23rd, 2008 at 6:21 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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What's on your mind? If you'll forgive the overstatement.
- Fred Allen
This entry was posted on Sunday, March 23rd, 2008 at 6:04 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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He is as good as his word - and his word is no good.
- Seamus MacManus
This entry was posted on Thursday, March 20th, 2008 at 5:43 pm and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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He hasn't an enemy in the world - but all his friends hate him.
- Eddie Cantor
This entry was posted on Thursday, March 20th, 2008 at 4:07 pm and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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Her figure described a set of parabolas that could cause cardiac arrest in a yak.
- Woody Allen
This entry was posted on Thursday, March 20th, 2008 at 3:51 pm and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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He used statistics the way a drunkard uses lampposts - for support, not illumination.
- Andrew Lang
This entry was posted on Sunday, March 16th, 2008 at 6:53 pm and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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If you don't like my opinion of you - improve yourself!
This entry was posted on Saturday, March 15th, 2008 at 5:42 pm and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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The triumph of sugar over diabetes.
- George Jean Nathan
This entry was posted on Saturday, March 15th, 2008 at 5:40 pm and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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Never enter a battle of wits unarmed.
This entry was posted on Saturday, March 15th, 2008 at 7:59 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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Some folks are wise and some are otherwise.
- Tobias George Smolett
This entry was posted on Saturday, March 15th, 2008 at 5:35 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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He was a solemn, unsmiling, sanctimonious old iceberg who looked like he was waiting for a vacancy in the Trilogy.
- Mark Twain
This entry was posted on Saturday, March 15th, 2008 at 5:09 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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He is always lost in thought - it's unfamiliar territory.
This entry was posted on Thursday, March 13th, 2008 at 7:51 pm and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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I always wanted to be a trouble-shooter but now I see you are not worth it!
This entry was posted on Thursday, March 13th, 2008 at 6:37 pm and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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She looked like a huge ball of fur on two well-developed legs.
- Nancy Mitford
This entry was posted on Thursday, March 13th, 2008 at 6:35 pm and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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His ears made him look like a taxicab with both doors open.
- Howard Hughes ( about Clark Gable)
This entry was posted on Thursday, March 13th, 2008 at 6:07 pm and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
- Fred Allen
This entry was posted on Thursday, March 13th, 2008 at 5:30 pm and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 12th, 2008 at 1:00 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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You've got the brain of a four-year-old boy, and I bet he was glad to get rid of it.
- Groucho Marx
This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 12th, 2008 at 1:00 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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She is a peacock in everything but beauty.
- Oscar Wilde
This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 12th, 2008 at 1:00 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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Never enter a battle of wits unarmed.
This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 12th, 2008 at 1:00 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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The best part of you ran down your mother's legs.
- Jackie Gleason
This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 12th, 2008 at 1:00 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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Oh dear »
He has the attention span of a lightning bolt.
- Robert Redford
This entry was posted on Monday, March 10th, 2008 at 1:00 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.
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Oh dear »
snappy repartee: What you'd say if you had another chance.
This entry was posted on Monday, March 10th, 2008 at 1:00 am and is filed under Funny jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.